Very frequently we hear people or even ourselves say “I know what to do to lose weight, I just need more motivation”, “I know very well what I have to do to reach my goals, but I need motivation”, “I lack motivation to carry out my projects, but I don’t know how to do it ”… etc. In other words, all of our objectives are based on improving motivation to carry out what we set out to do.
There is some truth in these statements: if you can find the right source of motivation , you will be able to achieve everything you want, but why is it so difficult to be motivated and we neglect our goals?
Often times it is not your level of motivation that is the problem, but a self-defeating mindset that puts bumps in our own path. Learn how to remedy this problem.
What mistake is usually made with the concept of motivation?
All of us in our life have set goals, objectives and tasks to perform, no matter if they are large or small, the problem is that many times in the process of meeting them we can leave them halfway for a simple reason: our motivation disappears .
When you think about being motivated, perhaps the first thing that comes to mind is that you should have some reward for what you achieve or some punishment for not having met your goal, for example depriving yourself of something you like. This is where the problem occurs, the logical conclusion is that you need more discipline
There is a myth that says that people who are able to create healthy habits have an enormous amount of discipline, in this way they manage to get up early and go to the gym, no matter how dark and cold it can get, however, it is not discipline that is essential factor to improve our motivation .
What factors can improve our motivation?
Psychological research has shown that people capable of creating healthy habits do not have more discipline but more self-compassion .
That is, instead of reproaching themselves for not being perfect all the time, they wonder how things could have been different. Instead of telling yourself “I’m a loser,” the right thing to do is to think about what led you to miss the goal.
Therefore, people who achieve their goals do not see these situations as a problem in themselves, but as a puzzle that must be solved. This is called problem solving (mindset). This means that you force yourself to face the reality of the situation instead of judging yourself for the bad decisions or behaviors that you could have followed.
conclusion
Some of the reasons for lack of motivation may be not getting enough sleep or being too demanding at work. What do you do to feel so tired? Instead of being hard on yourself and making yourself feel worse, you should take care of yourself to function better and see what factor is influencing you to not be motivated.
When a friend or family member is having a bad time, you speak to them with understanding and kindness. That is what you should do with yourself: treating yourself with the same dignity is the only way to solve your problems.
The healthiest people practice self-compassion when they want to achieve something, this gives them mental clarity and emotional distance when it comes to adopting a solution to their problems and having greater opportunities to do things well.
Reference
- Darya Rose, The secret ingredient you’re missing for stronger motivation. For Greatist [Revised July 2016]
